Lexi's Baptism

 

Today our Lexi girl was baptized by her Daddy. 

The whole day was so special to me. I am so proud of Lexi for wanting to be a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints and for choosing to be responsible for her choices. 

I am also so proud of her for just getting through the day hahaa =)

I told our bishop months and months ago that we kind of had a problem concerning Lexi. In our particular Stake, they have Stake day baptisms. They do this because there are so many kids that want to be baptized and it saves time and efforts. However, it means that your baptism is shared with lots of other people.

Well, for anyone that knows our Lexi, knows that being around or in front of a lot of people, especially ones she does not know, is extremely uncomfortable for her. I told the bishop I was really worried that if she were to be baptized with a lot of people watching her that honestly I didn't think she would do it. I also really wanted the day to be about the actual baptism. I didn't want Lexi to have to be focused on people...I wanted her to be able to just focus on how special getting baptized was.

Unfortunately, we were not granted to have her own baptism. BUT we did work it out so that she was the only one in our ward getting baptized. This meant that we would do the first part as a stake, the opening stuff and talk on Baptism, but that we would be able to spilt up for the rest. So this meant that she would be able to get baptized and confirmed in front of just her family.

Unfortunately, this still wasn't really good enough. I blame myself too. I should have warned the guy who was doing the Stake talk for everyone. Because within the first two seconds of his talk he asked Lexi to stand up and answer a question. In front of everyone. In the Chapel.

Oh. My. Goodness.

Being asked to do this caused her to  immediately start crying and lean in to me so hard I swear she was kind of hurting me lol. I felt so terrible. Her head was buried in to me and I could hear her heart racing so fast. She truly was so nervous and uncomfortable. She didn't recover until the end either....

Eventually, we got to the part when it was time to get into the font and be baptized but the damage was  already done and she was not having it. 

So.... 

it took quite a bit to get her in that water. This was weird. Like, really weird. Because, well, Baptism is supposed to ya know, be completely HER choice. If I didn't know Lexi so well and didn't talk with her about wanting to get baptized as much as I did, I think I would have called it and said lets go.

BUT because I knew she wanted it so so much, I stuck to my gut and together Jimmy and I coaxed her into the boiling water (seriously, SO HOT). 

And she was baptized! I didn't get to see it from the front angle. She made me promise not to move from those stairs lol but it was still one of the most beautiful sights I ever saw. Father and Daughter together. And Lexi making a beautiful covenant with her Heavenly Father to live righteously.

After she got out, we got dressed and it was time for a talk by her Grandma on the Holy Ghost and a song by Bret and the boys, then the confirmation, and then a couple words by some of the Ward members like the Bishop and Primary President.

It was all beautiful. But Lexi never looked up. As soon as she sat down she buried her face in me again, and literally, never looked up again. Not once.

Oh boy.

She didn't even look up when Grandma was talking! 

And then when it was time for the confirmation. She still wouldn't budge. 

So....

Together we went and I sat on the chair and Lexi was on my lap. You could joke that I had the best seat in the house =)

But on a more serious note. It was actually very very real, humbling, and serene to be sitting there so close with my daughter when she received the Holy Ghost. It was such a tender moment.

And I'll never forget the way Lexi looked up at me afterwards. I could tell that she had felt the spirit.

But after we sat down again, she again buried her face deep into my chest. 

And it probably took a solid 5 minutes after it was completely finished for her to get up. 

FINALLY, she was able to stand on her own two feet and be normal.

Yay =)

We took a couple family pictures and you can barely see Lexi which I think is kind of perfect and hilarious.

Anyways, it was a beautiful beautiful day and I am so grateful God gave me such a sweet spirit to look over and protect. Lexi is definitely a special and unique soul.

One of the most touching things that was said was by the Bishop who said, Lexi was one of the purest and sweetest spirits he has ever met.

I am so grateful that we are so close too. Lexi makes me feel like a mother. I feel so needed, tender, and nurturing because of her and it's a very humbling and strong feeling. I appreciate the way that it makes me feel and the mom that it has and is shaping me to be.

I am so proud of you Lexi Christine and I love love love love love you more than I'll ever be able to say.

Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ love you too. 

Side note - Another reason today was so special because my whole family was together (minus Jare who was up at BYU) This was an amazing feeling and I was so so so touched that everyone came to support us and Jimmy and Lexi. Even Tommy and Holly came from New Mexico! 

It was seriously... just incredible.

Thank you to everyone. I love you!